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Q&A | Etiquette[BACK TO ALL QUESTIONS & ANSWERS]

Is it acceptable to ask for cash in lieu of wedding gifts?

The short answer to cash in lieu of wedding Gifts is: no!

Even though it has become more and more common for engaged couples to request money or gift vouchers instead of gifts, it is not accepted wedding etiquette practice, and can come across as tacky. While it’s true that nobody wants to receive twenty ice crushers or yet another vase which is destined to collect dust in a dark corner of the garage, the subject of money should not be broached on the invitation. The only way to get around this sticky subject is to discuss your wishes with whoever has been assigned the task of organising the bridal shower (in most cases, this will be the Maid of Honour). When guests call her to RSVP to the wedding or shower, she can tell them that you would appreciate a monetary gift instead of a gift – but only if they ask. Close family and friends will probably ask you directly if you would prefer money, anyway, and Aunt Madge will probably give you a gaudy ceramic Lazy Susan even if you did specify money. Don’t forget to extend your sincerest gratitude in your thank-you notes, no matter what you receive from your guests… there is no substitute for class!

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